Be, E-Mine

 

 

It’s no secret that the February blues call for some hot chocolate and maybe even a warm shoulder to cuddle up to. But it seems like Millennials have given up on  the days of romantic “how we first met” stories .

“It’s  all about the swipe”

-Ashley Benne, 20, Student on Tinder an online dating App

It is safe to say that the internet has brought many things together making the notion of Time and  space disappear. This concept is bringing people together as love crosses borders all around the country and globe.

But is online dating the best thing since sliced bread for love? Or is it the greatest scam?

An article in the New York times says the latter. According to reports made by the FBI, online dating apps milked victims of all ages and orientations out of more than $200 million last year.

For those of you reading this, you probably think well that would never happen to me.

So what is behind all of this? Does love make us do crazy things? The article in the New York Times In” Online Dating, ‘Sextortion’ and Scams”, states that our brain links love to the same feelings of euphoria that cocaine and heroin produce. And we all know that normally smart individuals would do anything to get a fix. So it could be that if your not careful, users can find themselves swiping right for a Jihottie or turn into victims of thousands of dollars in a scam .

Catfish, a new term coined by a show on MTV (link here) shows that you might not always be getting what you think your getting in the online world.

Thousands of users find themselves clicking on profiles or even arranging dates with the woman of their dreams when  in reality, the woman might not even be a woman or look like the photos posted in any way, shape or form.

But it isn’t all negative for the online dating world. According to an article in the Daily beast, over 90 million singles use online dating. even Martha Stewart has found herself an avid user of online dating  even Martha Steward. As the popular fashion stylist Natalie Joos recently wrote, “Last year I would’ve died if anyone found out I was on one of those sites, but now it’s just like any other distracting hobby.”

Online dating has become so popular that a newly released report by popular dating site, eHarmony, found that online dating is the second most popular way to meet new partners.

If you think making a profile is  confusing or that online dating just isn’t for you, there are plenty of tricks that can help you find the one.

Remember… in the online world you can just fake it.. till you make it..

“How to make online dating work” is an article in the New York Times that focuses on tips to make the most out of your online romance. Vogue also recently published an article on the pro’s and con’s of online dating

 

 

But has online dating officially replaced the old school version of meeting after class for a bottle of pop and a sundae?

I for one don’t think it has.

The online world of dating has given students and working millennials an easy and quick way to meet someone. What used to be time consuming now happens in under ten minutes as any dating app feeds users with hundreds of single in their proximate vicinity. An article in The Huffington Post states that people who meet online are more likely to break up.

The internet provides us with choice , why purchase a pair of black boots at your local boutique when you can find 37 different styles,  colors and prices… online

 “Think about women going dress shopping. We always think that the better dress is in the next shop, Now we’re shopping for relationships; we’re looking for the better deal.”

” If one date doesn’t work out, another will” says Francesca C. who has been on three different Tinder dates just this past week. It is this mentality that is detrimental in finding ‘The One”. People aren’t willing to make relationships work or last when they know that there are 100 more where that one came from.

There is also a hidden idea going around that people on online dating apps or sites are just looking for a causal fling.

Tinder users have to write NO ONS on their profile to show users that they aren’t looking for a one night stand. Many  young adults like Francesca have dates lined up for ever night of the week. Why settle for Tom when Henry, Marc and Joe are just around the corner.

People’s superficiality comes out when dates are solely based on looks. you have a “match” because you think that person is attractive without knowing anything about their personality or intelligence. According to an article on Salon.com, Brains are trumping beauty as the dating app Tinder talks about adding to features.

In an interview published with The Standard, the CEO of Tinder revealed that it’s app is in the process of developing an education and work place add-on that will help users identify their intellectual equals.

That being said, part of me does believe that online thing isn’t the worst thing out there. My aunt met her husband through match.com and they are happily married with two little boys. With friends who work from 6 am to midnight, I can imagine that going out during the week is basically impossible, which leaves that bed empty for 5/7 nights.

But despite it all, I still believe that getting dressed and going to a cocktail party to strike strike up some old fashioned conversation is still the best way to meet a date, but who knows.. maybe one day everyone will be using apps to find the perfect match.

For those of you interested in Online dating , an article in the Daily Beast gives six pieces of advice to anyone willing to listen. The article also warns users about the potential to meet someone trying to scam you out of money and time… the two most precious resources.

So remember, all is fair in love and online dating.